is it worth fighting over?

Made it out to the park for an extended stretch and workout this morning, excellent in every way – cool and breezy weather before a rain, no mosquitos at all, no rush to get home. Even just riding my bicycle over there, I felt lighter as heaviness and accumulated stress dripped away.

And once there, it was ideal. Almost no one else in the park, giant trees whispering overhead, and good memories of past practices with a university group there. I learned how to say “wood-pecker” in Japanese under those trees and left any number of worn-down circles behind from the motions of ba gua zhang.

Good memories all, and in stark contrast to another morning practice about a week ago. Same group, new venue. A couple years back we changed parks for these lessons, moving to a park nearer their location, no more bicycle commute for me. It was raining all morning, so we lined up inside a nearby recreation facility to buy tickets.

Several of us had arrived early and were near the head of the line. It grew steadily behind us and I worried about space issues. Once upstairs, we staked out a spot in one of the corners and started stretching while watching the other groups who came in. MMA/ grappling/ K1 type groups soon staked out their spaces on the mats. In came the karate kids, some judoka, even two guys who seemed to be practicing the fake strikes and falls of pro wrestling very seriously.

In came a non-Japanese carrying three very large bags of pads and the like. He cast his eyes about, looked at our clearly-marked corner (wolves use piss; people on the mats use their bags and clothes to mark territory) and ambled right over.

I couldn’t believe it. He went right to the corner and threw his bags down one, two, three, right in between two of our bags and just in the corner. Keeping his back to us, he pulled out a mobile phone and called some buddies.

The university kids in my group weren’t going to make a move. They kept stretching or moving as they were, being very polite and Japanese and non-interventionist. One second to make a decision and… I…. joined my friends in not responding, in letting this guy completely steal our space.

I was going to wait it out, hope he would see the light and be reasonable. Fool. What was I thinking?

More of our group came, four of his students came. Even his students were obviously surprised or confused by the situation. There was absolutely no way of mistaking it – this was OUR territory, and he had swiped it. And none of us had the balls to challenge him.

The balls or the gall or what? Is it really worth the trouble? What are the options? Talk to him and he realizes the situation and moves his group elsewhere. Not bloody likely. Talk to him and the situation escalates – more likely. I am not going to fight over some space on the mats. (Nor could I win – he was tough and a fighter. I am neither). It could escalate and we would have to back down in front of all and move our group even further away. Unpleasant. It could escalate and we would run crying to The Authorities because the very bad man had taken our space and we couldn’t handle it ourselves. Unpleasant.

I ended up approaching him, trying to handle it without escalating the situation. His response was simple and, in that situation, irrefutable.

“We like the corner.”

OK, one second to respond. Press the issue (“that’s nice, pal, but we were here first” Smack, fight is over and balding taiji guy with slightly protruding gut is hauled off the mats by his ankles) or swallow pride and deal with crowded mats all morning.

Damn it, this is a once-a-month special practice (sometimes less) and one of my few chances for close scrutiny on this particular tai ji form. Without being anchored in the corner, we are going to be pressed in upon from all sides. All morning long.

DAMN IT, one second is up.

Balding taiji guy with definitely protruding gut backs down. But remains petulant enough to make a point of slowly walking directly between the instructor and his four students for three trips back and forth, moving my bags from what had been our corner to what was our new little strip along the side.

Childish.

Peevish.

Petulant.

But I had to do something, after all, after having done nothing. I really showed them.

The rest of the morning was spent predictably dodging neighboring judo-ka and MMA people as they came rolling, falling, and flying into what also should have been clearly recognizable as “our” space.

Any amount of that will happen, it is unavoidable. It can even be fun, making a game out of noticing and dodging the incoming with quick and natural motions. But it typically elicits a small apology, a quick move out of the way. Normal, common sense kind of stuff.

Nope, not here. This is a vicious world. I have been off in ooey-gooey lala taiji harmony land too long. Memories of the harsh and unforgiving world of the playground resurfaced after lying dormant for years. There are no apologies there, no thoughts for others.

I was thinking about all of that while riding my bicycle back from the massive 300-year-old park where I had practiced this morning, glad for the early rise and the completely unrestricted space.